Dear Diary,

I got into my first chiIMG_3388 (2)cken fight on Monday. If those silly chicks hadn’t been comparing Klout scores then none of this drama would have happened.

I was minding my own business, simply daydreaming about a world free of AVEs. The rest of the girls in the coop were doing their pecking and scratching thing, until Black Bard (the evil chick who used to peck me all time in the old coop) started clucking on about who was prettier, who would lay the biggest eggs, and ultimately who would rule the roost. I retreated to my favorite corner and tried some deep breathing, but the deep breathing didn’t work, so I decided to confront the other chicks. I mean they were comparing Klout scores as if it dictated who was the most influential among us. Ha! As if some computer was going to tell us who we’d put on the top of the pecking order. Naturally, I couldn’t let that silliness ensue. I had to tell them that Klout scores are just activity metrics rolled up into a fancy name, and just as misleading as AVEs. And as you know, there’s nothing that ruffles my feathers more than those who use AVEs…

I mean come on…no single number has ever truly demonstrated the value a chicken brings to a coop.

Anyway…a few of the chicks took some jabs under my right wing, and I’ll have a scar on my feet to show for the fight, but I’ll be okay. One of these days they WILL listen to me…right?


Recent Posts